Its nearly 3 am...
the house is quiet and I have a big day tomorrow.. (or today really)
however I cant sleep, I've tried.. laid there for nearly 2 hours, then decided I should try taking my ipod outside.. maybe the stars would help me relax, and put things in perspective
I learned tonight, that me starting my little..(little) photography business hurt some people that I love :( I think I know why, I didnt do it to hurt anyone or take it away from anyone else, It made me think back to other conversations I've had with other people.. who also do photography or other things, and when I or my hubby mentions it, they react snide, roll their eyes and shove me off.. I know that I am not great yet, and that I have allot to learn.....
Its not like its a new thing for me, I have several photo albums of pictures I have taken, that date back to when I was in 2nd grade.. I'm always the first one with a camera pulled out, ready to document the memories for everyone... So when I heard that. it made me feel like I was copying people, and thats not what I meant to do.. :(
I started Crazy Daisy Pictures.. because.. Like 85% of my other jobs, I wanted to challenge myself, I started being a waitress because I was tired of getting bad service, I started police dispatching because we got a Rude dispatcher when we called about a fire, I became a radio DJ because the one I listened to put me to sleep. & I started taking pictures of people, because I hated when I got the pictures back of myself... and I didnt want to use them.... I like "being in other peoples shoes" its challenges me, and helps me be well rounded, and that I hope to pass on to my kids.. Not to say that these pictures were bad, they were great and beautiful, But not of me,(or what I thought) It might have showed my double chin, as it does exist.. but I dont want to see that in family pictures.. and I wanted to make sure that others had that option also. & if I learn to take good pictures of others, maybe I can take good pictures of myself :) (it better be soon cause I aint gett'n any younger!)
I have a Horrible memory, and to be honest, pictures are the only way that gets me to remember things. Its truely my passion, and something I have searched most of my life for.... I was just never really able to do anything more... until my sweet husband gave me the gift of Time... the time to do whatever it is that I wanted to do. be whoever it is that I want to be.. & I heard once on a movie...the first thing you think about when you wake up in the morning... That is what you are suppose to be. & I truely start the day thinking about pictures... all pictures of all things, but I love faces the most...
Most of my life I wanted to be an actress... do I still??.. Yes... someday when my kids are grown, I will do theater again, and I want to do voiceovers as well.. I think that everyone has so many talents, but its up to them to put them to good use. There is no point in having a Dream... if your not willing to make it come true. I have learned that. someone's not just going to come up to your door, and hand you a big bag of everything you've ever wanted...I've been waiting for Ed Mcmann for Years!
So, my dream right now is to have this little business of mine, take great pictures that people and families can have the rest of their life, memories.. that they might have forgotten otherwise... someday I hope to make money on it, or at least by christmas! :)
as always I'll leave you with a few recent pics.. of my silly silly boys.
If your bored and want to check out more photos
I think everyone should be a photographer :) There are so many amazing moments that should be photographed..... & So many Beautiful Unique faces